We had another gathering of Pam's sisters last week. We enjoy having them here and I am thrilled to see Pam laughing and engaging with them. And I made too much food, as usual. Apparently, if I cook, they will come. Works for me! I love to cook and especially for people that I love. Next time, it will be simple sandwiches and a fruit plate. I'll just have to make three or four different loaves of fresh bread. Our middle daughter put me on to baking bread in a Dutch Oven and I love making my homemade Jewish rye with caraway seeds.
Pam's condition has seemed to have stabilized. I have not noticed any new symptoms. She had her annual checkup with her primary care provider and that went well. Well, except for the clock-drawing test. That didn't go well. She was not able to draw the clock correctly and this is often the case with dementia patients. It can indicate that there are cognitive issues requiring additional study. What surprised me was that she had a watch on and could have looked at that. But I guess that someone with cognitive issues probably wouldn't even think about that. Her needs for assistance are mostly confined to helping her up out of the recliner or into the car, and then just keeping her balance stable while she shuffle walks.
Yesterday was one of her bad days, as she was in and out of sleeping in the recliner. When she wasn't sleeping, she was just in a haze. Later in the day she came out of it. And that is how it is around here. On good days we chat and she watches TV or does some chores. On bad ones, she is basically just..... present.
I spent much of the last week working on a succession plan. What happens if I am incapacitated or no longer here? We have the Power of Attorney, wills, etc all notarized and in place. But it is important to identify all of the bank accounts, ongoing bills, insurance policies, vehicle titles, deeds, etc so that the designated person can maintain the status quo financially. Even more important is helping determine all the care needs for Pam, both short-term and long-term. In the event that I go first, the girls need to step up until a longer term plan can be established. Someone will need to stay with her to deal with the change and the grief (maybe it will be joy, who knows?) . Someone needs to manage her meds and meals.
I have not yet engaged any in-home care providers. I struggle with defining what kind of care is needed, as Pam is still pretty self-sufficient when it comes to personal hygiene and self-care. Just what is this person going to be doing with her? Companionship is easier to say than to accomplish. I have hesitated contacting them until I can better define what the needs are. I certainly recognize that having someone in will relieve me and give me some 'self-time'. But frankly, I don't know what else I would do. I already get plenty of keyboard time while Pam is napping or watching TV. I forced her out of the house earlier this week by going for Chinese food. I called one of our daughters and she joined us. Pam ate well, but seemed anxious to get home by the time we were done.
Today is Friday and someone I know was up at the butt-crack of dawn ready to go to Lowe's to buy Halloween decorations. At 7 am she wanted to know why I was not dressed and ready to go. So off we went to Lowe's, where our daughter works. I got a power strip for the garage and three gallons of RV antifreeze and she got $100 worth of decorations. By 8:30am we were back in the car. But she was disappointed because she was not able to get a bale of hay. Some days I wonder if her having this disease is going to kill off my brain cells also!
One of the good things to happen lately is the author James Patterson. Pam recently picked up a couple of his books and is back to being an avid reader. So, until next time. Remember, any day that you wake up is a good day!
Much love to you and Pam, Cuz.
ReplyDeleteWow! Reading that’s a big one, maybe do a book club 😁
ReplyDeleteLoved reading this, I will pas it on to the sisters
Yes, happy to hear that.That was a beautiful Bruce♥️
DeleteYour openess and capturing this is a blessing. I have to believe your family is very happy to be so informed.
ReplyDeleteBruce - did not mean to be anonymous. Art Currier
DeleteYou are doing a fantastic, healthy thing for YOU by keeping up this blog. Love you, and I think of you often.
ReplyDeleteEnjoyed reading your blog, as always. Your optimistic attitude is amazing and just what Pam, her sisters, and your girls need. Know we are thinking of you and keeping all in our prayers. Love, Stevie and Dan
ReplyDeleteWe provide services for seniors who require assistance with their daily living activities and who aim to enhance the experience of daily life. When you move into our personal care home of Stone Mountain Georgia, you can rest assured that we will respect your independence and value your dignity. Browse through our website to learn more about us.
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